I Need Some Help


I feel stagnant as I lay here. I almost feel sloth-like. My brain is focusing on a thousand things, but my will to act is frozen.

I haven’t been as active in my pursuit to write as I would like.

I am trying to wrap my brain around my novel and what seems to be easy has taken a turn into a land where overthinking reigns.

All I have to do is write one chapter every four months and I can’t seem to muster three words.

Its weight is unbearable.

I’ve been reading to help pass the time and make myself feel as if I’m actually being productive.

I read Catcher in the Rye. I am not sure what I truly think about the book. What I know is there is a hidden message and it drives me crazy to think I have not solved it.

I am now reading 1984. It’s officially freaking me out.

They say if you want to write a certain genre, you should read books that are in the same genre. So I decided to start.

Here’s my issue, and if you please, give some advice on what to do:

I am writing a book about women who are enslaved by men.

The general theme is somehow (not really sure how), women are slowly detained by men who have now taken over. The men take the women and turn them into everything they desire (basically sex robots, but they also want personal slaves – sort of a Stepford Wives scenario but much more sinister)

Of course, the men can’t enslave all the women, that would be absurd, so a rebellion of women is forming to stop the men.

However, some of the robots are becoming self-aware. (Enter huge plot twist)

My problem is this: the more I read the news, the more I see my story and it’s fucking with me.

Not the robot part, of course, but the separation of families, the way certain states chip away at a woman’s rights to her body, and just the moral breakdown of the government as a whole.

I see a government full of men with too many religious bearings to realize they are creating a world that, in theory, could jeopardize years of progress made by women to not be under the thumbs of men.

It’s depressing and I wonder if I shouldn’t hang up the phone and the tv, as it were, and just write. Let the tyranny unfold and deliver a book to the masses in hopes it will never become reality.

I wonder if that’s what George Orwell thought when he started writing his novel?

Also, I may need meds and solitude.

I’ll keep you posted.

If you want to read the first chapter of my book, The Takeover, you can follow me on Channillo. <— that’s the link.

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3 thoughts on “I Need Some Help

    1. I look into it. And you’re right – I started writing and was like “ooh an outline!” Sometimes all it takes is a few words of discontent to see the silver lining. And thank you.

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